There was once a time I felt safe. Not necessarily as a black person in America but as a woman. It has always been understood as morally wrong to use physical force on a woman. That could be because women are seen as weaker beings and though that’s a demeaning fact it worked in our favor. Recently I’ve gotten smacked in the face with reality. The bodies of blacks and women are no longer safe. And it hit me that not only am I an immigrant, not only am I black, but I am also a woman which now makes my life worthless amongst those who are ruled by their egos and get off on their power. I’d love to teach those who have never had to worry about these things what it’s like to be a second rate citizen and what it’s like to fear for your life walking out of the door but there is really no way to feel what I feel without living life in my shoes. These entitled cops are targeting anyone who they feel superior to and in almost all cases they have been black individuals. They should be tracking down child molesters, rapists, and shooting murderers who enter a church and massacre the people in it. Yet they escalate situations and more times than not publicly execute American citizens who’s rights they stripped away.
What worries me is this. Not only can I get raped walking out of my door by some sick freak on any random day of the week and not only can I be abused or killed by some anti-black fake follower of Christ on any given day but now those people who took an oath to protect EVERYONE have taken it upon themselves to instill their own form of “justice”. No due process, no Miranda rights. Just inflated egos and carelessness. And I tried to give these crooked cops some sort of leeway. “Not all cops are bad”, I would say to myself, “I’ve never been harassed at a traffic stop” but that lucky living has turned into fear.
I can’t even have a bad day. I think its humorous that a cop who slams a half dressed teenage girl to the floor can declare he was not in the right state of mind because he’s having a bad day, but if I mouth of because I’m having a bad day it can result in handcuffs or death. Why is it that we are not holding these cops at a higher standard? Because they have a badge, they will literally make off with blood on their hands. When did this become ok? When did it become ok for someone to lose their cool in a high stress situation when the reason they are hired is to deescalate the situation? Will they now proclaim mental illness to escape justice? The sad part is, that isn’t even possible because these murderers are getting off with not even a slap on the wrist but with pay and vacation.
What makes this all worse is the ignorant people who believe these miscreants are somehow justified in what they do. Should Mike Brown have been executed surrendering with his hands up? Should Sandra Bland have had her head smashed into the ground by a man who then responded to her epilepsy claim with “good”? Should Samuel Dubose have been shot in the head for missing a front license plate? When did people’s basic rights become null and void because an officer got a blow to his ego? We have the right to speak what we feel when we feel it without the need to say “yes massa” and “no massa” to keep from getting a modern day lynching. I am tired of seeing people harassed for being a minority. I’m tired of the disrespect produced by some of these cops who can’t seem to just do their job without getting their emotions involved. And I’m tired of them shooting us and getting off scot-free.
I’ve kept from writing for months. My anger and hurt left me clouded, but I can’t keep watching this brutality. We went through our civil rights movement. How is it 50 plus years later we are fighting for the same rights our ancestors already fought for? They took the police dogs and fire hoses. They took the beatings and lynch mobs. We shouldn’t have to fight for basic human rights. And this isn’t just a black versus white thing. This is a people in power against those without power. This should be a movement where we all realize that black bodies are piling up on the street and it should disgust us. All of us. Black, white, and all others. We need to fight back and demand our respect back. I am tired of looking over my shoulder on the street and in my rearview in the car. I want my body to be respected. And I want black bodies to regain their worth. If this makes you uncomfortable then good. If it makes you defensive than you should examine yourself. And if it rouses you then even better. Do something, anything. But don’t sit in silence.
Dreamers and Believers
Kellz
City Girl Secrets; An Introspetive Retrospection 